Wedding Series #4 - Dress Shopping!

I think I might be a bit weird.  Whereas most brides-to-be rush off to try dresses on pretty much straight away I avoided it completely for 9  months.  I hate being faffed with by people - I also hate the hairdresser, doctor, and anything else that requires people to touch me. Ugh.  The idea of having to strip down to my undies, be strapped into a dress and then required to parade around on display is not something that appealed to me.  Don't get me wrong, I love dresses, I've spent hours looking at dresses online, and I can't wait to actually wear the dress, but the process of getting to that point terrified me.


Eventually, with 9 months to go until our wedding (eeek!) the panic set in and I thought I'd better get a grip and at least try some dresses on.  I went at the weekend with my mum and we went to two different bridal shops.  I actually really enjoyed it. It's still a bizarre concept, and I'm still not one for having to stand nakey in public, but the ladies at both shops were absolutely lovely, and they made it a lot of fun.

The first shop was quite a traditional bridal boutique, really plush carpets and beautifully decorated. The dressing room was at the back and was a really big curtained off separate room,with mirrors all around and a podium in the middle - I've always wanted to stand on one of those after all my hours spent watching Say Yes to the Dress! We were given gloves so that our grubby paws (?!) didn't touch the dresses, and we had a nosey through them whilst chatting to the lovely lady about what style I was after.  We picked about 7 out and started trying them on.  I picked a few different styles - a big princessy one, a couple of strapless dresses,an A line and a couple with 'built up' necklines. 

What I loved about this shop - and the second shop too - is that they were completely honest and if a dress didn't suit me or the shape was all wrong, they would say so - at no point did I feel like they were trying to flog me a dress just to make a sale. Princessy was no-go because I was swallowed by dress, and fishtail was just horrendous.

These are a couple of the dresses I have tried on but discounted:

(Romantica, Hayden)

 

 

(Kiss the Frog, Eleanor)



 I always knew I didn't want a strapless dress too, I've got a fairly ample bosom (ha!) and I can't think of anything worse than being too booby on my wedding day, or constantly be pulling up my dress.  I really like lace and I like a sheer panel at the top, like this:

(Justin Alexander)

I loved how I could be completely honest about what I hated about each dress that I tried on, and I think it's really important not to feel you have to be polite.  I made this mistake the first time I ever went shopping and it meant I made no real progress, because I was trying dresses on that I didn't even like just because they were suggested to me by the shop.This time I didn't make that mistake and my mum was equally as brutal.
It turned out that the dress my mum picked out when we first went into the shop was our absolute favourite.  I loved it as soon as I put it on, and all 4 ladies working in the shop came over to look and they got all excited too.  They picked out a gorgeous veil to go with it and I paraded around for a good 15 minutes in it.  Mum was ready with her debit card, but I just felt like I needed to see more dresses; we had another appointment booked that afternoon anyway and my sister and best friend weren't there, so I wasn't ready to commit. I just wish I was more decisive.


Shop 2 was quite different - it was all quite boutiquey, with giant free standing mirrors and feature wallpaper.  The girls were all quite young and we were greeted with sparking wine and given little silk hearts to hang on the dresses I wanted to try, which was fun. I picked out 6 dresses to try, but overall I wasn't as keen on their selection as I'd been in shop 1.  I caused a bit of a commotion because I picked a brand new dress to try on first, and they'd all been really excited to see someone in it.  It was slightly awkward because they were having a special designer weekend and the designer was actually there, watching me try the dress on...!  It was beautiful, but far too princessy and poofy for me, at 5ft 1 I just felt completely swamped.  Everyone loved it,but It  just felt a bit too dress-up for me, especially as i'm only 25 and am always mistaken as being younger than I am. I felt quite bad saying that the dress was too poofy for me with the designer stood there, but honesty is definitely the best policy, and he was lovely.
I only found one dress I really liked in shop 2, and I didn't like it as much as the dress in shop 1, so I doubt i'll go back there. 

So i'm going to go and try a few more dresses on, but I think it'll be pretty much impossible to beat the dress we loved.  Eeek, exciting!


What I've learned so far:

1) Be honest.  Brutally.  You'll risk wasting your appointment trying on dresses you don't  like otherwise.
2) Ask to try with accessories and shoes - the right posture and a beautiful veil just makes it all look 'finished' and it makes it feel so much more real and easy to picture on the day.
3) Make sure you check the prices of the dresses before you try them on - in shop 2 I tried on a gorgeous dress but was then told it was £1600, which was a lot more than I'd be willing to pay. I'm just glad I didn't love it because they would be a tricky one!
4) Don't worry about being nakey -I was told just to keep my tights on in both shops, and the only person that saw me without a dress on was the lady buttoning the dresses up.
5)Wear a strapless bra- I need to take my own advice here.  I've only got a black strapless bra, so I just wore an ivory bra.  It way ok but for next time i'm going to get a white strapless bra so that the straps aren't getting in the way!

I'd love to show the pictures of the dresses I liked but as my fiance reads my blog I will have to keep schtum!

How did you find wedding dress shopping? Did you dread it too?

Suzy
xx

Wedding Series #3 How We're Saving Up

I know money can be a slightly sensitive subject and I don't profess to be any kind of expert but I've really enjoyed reading about how other brides-to-be have saved up and budgeted for their weddings, and I thought it might be vaguely interesting to talk about how we're doing it. A lot of the methods we've used aren't wedding specific so anyone wanting to save/make a little extra money can keep reading too...you're not getting away with it that easily ;)


We're about half-way to saving for our wedding and honeymoon, with 9 months to go...eeek! Typically it's me that does the wheeling and dealing (slightly overstating it..) with money, Adam is cheap to keep and he tends to just float along not worrying about it.  I wouldn't say I worry about money either but I quite enjoy the little thrill of making a little extra cash or vouchers unexpectedly, and it makes me feel a bit less guilty for all the stuff I buy because it's offset slightly.

For ease of reading I'll split it into two sections:  Spending Less and Earning More


Spending Less

Individual Savings Account -ISA
Not the most exciting way of making money but it's effective and kills two birds with one stone - saving money and making money from the interest.  I've made sure that every month since we got engaged, as soon as we've been paid I squirrel a big chunk of money away into an ISA - I find we don't miss it so much if it was never in the equation.  Everyone in the UK has a personal tax-free allowance of £5760, per year, and if you shop around you should be able to find an account paying interest of 2-3%, which might not sound a lot but I think getting get a couple of hundred extra pounds per year just by having your savings in an account is pretty super duper!
I'm also less likely to fritter money away if it's in a separate bank account that isn't quite as easy to plunge into as my current account.

 

Food Shopping
I've always been a big fan of Aldi as I think a lot of their produce is really good quality.  Since we've been saving up though we've made a more concerted effort to buy as much of our shopping from there as possible, rather than paying crazy Tesco prices, just for convenience.
Aldi's fruit and veg is really good, and I love the offers they do, particularly the super 6, where fruit and veg is massively reduced.  Some things will always have to be the proper brand - crisps, beans, yoghurts etc, but there's no good reason I can't get most of my shopping from there. 

Voucher Codes
Having always been tight with money, I undertake a time consuming and relentless mission to locate a voucher code for all online purchases.  This can be somewhat infuriating for hungry family members who just want to ORDERTHEDOMINOS.  But I can't.  Until I've ruled every code in or out. It'd definitely worth doing though, I quite often find a 10/15% off code or free p&p.  It's the little victories!
Good sites for this are: Voucher Codes and Retail Me Not but there are countless similar sites.

Earning More Money

Ebay
Selling your tat is a really good way of saving up; so far this year we've gotten rid of a load of old computer games, clothes and I even managed to get shut of a spare bottle of Pixi Glow Tonic for almost double the price I paid.  Admittedly it's a bit of a faff having to take pictures, write the descriptions and then coordinate postage, but the Ebay app is brilliant because you can now take a picture and upload it straight from the app.  You have to accept that sometimes you'll make less than you wanted (I still haven't forgotten you, pure silk dress from Monsoon...£10.00..!), but I'd say over time it evens itself out.

 

Cashback
There are several cashback sites which you can go through to make your online purchases and receive cashback or gift vouchers.I use topcashback, which has some really generous cashback percentages.  Sometimes these can take a while to show in your account, and I'd always go with the cheaper-on-the-day price, rather than what would be the cheapest with the cashback offer, just because I'm cautious like that, but for barely 30 seconds extra work when making an online purchase it'd definitely worth signing up to a cashback site.  I've made around £50 this year from doing this, and I do sometimes forget to make my purchases through topcashback, so it should be more really.
I've had cashback for my weekly online food shop, beauty and fashion purchases, as well as  home and car insurance - pretty much all companies have some kind of cashback offer on there so don't forget to look!

Shop and Scan
Shop and Scan is a consumer panel where you are rewarded with gift vouchers for providing information about your weekly  shopping habits.  Once accepted you are provided with a barcode scanner and are required to upload this information weekly, as well as providing pictures of your receipts.  I've found the company a bit of a pain in the bum to deal with - on a couple of occasions I've received rather pushy phonecalls, bordering on rude, when I've forgotten to upload my barcodes on a certain week, and I wouldn't say they were particularly generous in terms of points awarded, but It's not a massive chore to do once a week and I've decided to save up the vouchers for a bigger purchase, which keeps me motivated to keep going with it.  For your first upload you are awarded 1000 points (£10), but then it takes on average 6-7 weeks to accumulate each subsequent £10 voucher. You can choose from all manner of vouchers - we went with Amazon because it's a safe bet they'll stock anything we want.
To sign up to shop and scan there is a waiting list, so you need to register first at www.volunteer4panels.com/ and then carry on with your life until they decide you are worthy!

 

 

 

Survey Sites
The main 3 sites I am a member of are Valued opinions, Swagbucks and Toluna.
Again, survey sites aren't going to make a huge contribution to your savings, but I like receiving vouchers that I don't feel guilty spending, because it means I don't dip into our actual money for my frivolous little purchases.
I'm quite faddy when it comes to completing these surveys - the end reward seems a long was away so I'm not completely motivated all the time.
Generally you are first asked several qualifying questions to determine if you fall within the target sample, if not you aren't allowed to continue and you aren't compensated for your time on that survey.  This can be quite infuriating when you've already answered 20 questions, to be told, oh actually, you don't qualify, soz. This is very naughty, survey sites- tut.
Of the sites I am a member of Valued Opinions is the most generous - usually £0.50 to £1 per survey.  It's also the quickest to credit your account.  Toluna is pitifully slow with awarding your points, but I have had a couple of £10 vouchers from them in the last year, so if you have the time it's still worth a go.

 

 

Mystery Shopping - Market Force, Gapbuster
Now, I've only done this twice, so i'm not an expert, but potentially mystery shopping could be quite a lucrative sideline.  I've been offered jobs paying up to £100, but most are in the region of £10-20.  You are just required to go to the required place, at the required time and make a purchase.  You must then feed back on your experience, usually within the same day.  It's not for the faint hearted, and I'm terrible under pressure, so my heart was beating out of my chest, from the fear they might know I was a mystery shopper.  By law in the UK mystery shoppers must declare themselves as self employed as any income is subject to tax, which is a bit off putting for an occasional £10 profit.  If you're lucky though you can be chosen for panels to review hotels, high end shops, and restaurants. As it was, I went to KFC.  And bought a bucket meal. Different worlds!

Marking for an Exam Board
This is quite specific to teachers really, but if you're a teacher and aren't already marking GCSE/A Level for an exam board I'd definitely recommend it as a nice little income boost.  Most exam boards pay a set fee for each allocation, plus a bonus for timely completion, as well as a higher bonus rate for extra marking.  For two, two-week marking periods (January and June) I tend to end up with around £1600, which makes a massive difference financially and tends to pay for my car insurance and a holiday every year.  Technically Adam could become an assessor too as we're both teachers, but marking to such tight deadlines is so intense that our house would be chaos if we were both doing it!


Sadly our main expenditure aside from bills, is travel to and from work, which there is no avoiding.  Aside from a few measly Tesco Clubcard points on the £55-ish I spend on petrol every week, we haven't worked out how to claw any money back from this - if you have any ideas do let me know!

Hopefully this might have given you some ideas or motivation for saving or making a little extra money, and thank you if you made it all the way to the end..it turned into a bit of a book!


Suzy
xx